going to cebu tonight then leyte tomorrow.
time to get some serious writing done.
Friday, December 12, 2003
there's too much blood in my alcohol
or so faye says.
the other night i went out and decided to drink my blues away. i went to a bar with the sole intention of getting drunk.
so i did. got so stinking drunk i wasn't even aware that i had charged my phone and made a call.
my blues went away that night and came back full force the next day.
there is too much blood in my alcohol. need to purge the blood.
the other night i went out and decided to drink my blues away. i went to a bar with the sole intention of getting drunk.
so i did. got so stinking drunk i wasn't even aware that i had charged my phone and made a call.
my blues went away that night and came back full force the next day.
there is too much blood in my alcohol. need to purge the blood.
Tuesday, December 09, 2003
do you ever get that feeling that everything around you is changing while you remain unchanged, locked in a past you would rather not remember?
or that feeling that the events surrounding you are conspiring to make you remember something you would like to forget, or revisit a feeling that you would rather bury?
these feelings keep haunting me now. i try to keep them at bay but sometimes they are too strong, and i'm too tired to fight them.
almost a year. what is? i'm not really sure. a life-defining moment, surely. but i'd be at a loss if you asked me to label it. almost a year.
the saddity of it all.
or that feeling that the events surrounding you are conspiring to make you remember something you would like to forget, or revisit a feeling that you would rather bury?
these feelings keep haunting me now. i try to keep them at bay but sometimes they are too strong, and i'm too tired to fight them.
almost a year. what is? i'm not really sure. a life-defining moment, surely. but i'd be at a loss if you asked me to label it. almost a year.
the saddity of it all.
Monday, December 08, 2003
dear diary...
felt like writing a dear diary thing. on the way home. however, the dear diary became a rundown of the things i did over the past 2 days. not necessarily in chronological order:
1. went to the beach
2. had breakfast at the beach
3. cooked pinaputok na imelda fish (humongous. about a foot and a half long.)
4. ate lechon.
5. played beach volleyball. lost. :(
6. swam (water so clear you can see your feet)
7. took pictures of the sunset
8. made friends with a hermit crab. name's basti. had a photo shoot with basti
9. bonfire at the beach
10. made like a sardine to squeeze into a banig with 7 other people
10. slept
11. woke up early.
12. contemplated life.
13. cooked breakfast
14. ate breakfast
15. swam again.
16. cleaned up.
17. ate lunch.
18. packed up.
19. went to manaoag to say thanks.
20. went home to baguio.
all in all, a fun weekend. as calvin would say, the days are just packed! and i just have to grin.
1. went to the beach
2. had breakfast at the beach
3. cooked pinaputok na imelda fish (humongous. about a foot and a half long.)
4. ate lechon.
5. played beach volleyball. lost. :(
6. swam (water so clear you can see your feet)
7. took pictures of the sunset
8. made friends with a hermit crab. name's basti. had a photo shoot with basti
9. bonfire at the beach
10. made like a sardine to squeeze into a banig with 7 other people
10. slept
11. woke up early.
12. contemplated life.
13. cooked breakfast
14. ate breakfast
15. swam again.
16. cleaned up.
17. ate lunch.
18. packed up.
19. went to manaoag to say thanks.
20. went home to baguio.
all in all, a fun weekend. as calvin would say, the days are just packed! and i just have to grin.
hmmm...
i'm still trying to figure out if there's any truth to this.
Who's Your Inner Buffy Bad-Girl? Find out @ She's Crafty
Who's Your Inner Buffy Bad-Girl? Find out @ She's Crafty
Sunday, December 07, 2003
itching to go
the whole family is going to the beach tomorrow. ü
it's been ages since the last time we did that. almost 10 years? 30 pounds ago? hehehe.
can't wait to go. bound to be fun and fattening. but that's life in my family.
now let's see if we can fatten tiborce up. ü
it's been ages since the last time we did that. almost 10 years? 30 pounds ago? hehehe.
can't wait to go. bound to be fun and fattening. but that's life in my family.
now let's see if we can fatten tiborce up. ü
Friday, December 05, 2003
and the inevitable conclusion is...
did a lot of things today.
1. put a baby to sleep
2. slept beside the baby
3. did some grocery shopping
4. played with the kids
5. baked about 250 pieces of oatmeal raisin cookies (with help from the kids and richel)
6. made some peaches and cream dessert for my family.
and my day started at lunchtime.
not bad, huh? the cookies alone should have taken the entire afternoon. but there we go. it only took me 2-3 hours. with dinner and clean up thrown in.
...i must be depressed.
1. put a baby to sleep
2. slept beside the baby
3. did some grocery shopping
4. played with the kids
5. baked about 250 pieces of oatmeal raisin cookies (with help from the kids and richel)
6. made some peaches and cream dessert for my family.
and my day started at lunchtime.
not bad, huh? the cookies alone should have taken the entire afternoon. but there we go. it only took me 2-3 hours. with dinner and clean up thrown in.
...i must be depressed.
going through junk
somebody asked me if i still have the sketch he made of me. so i went looking for it in my room.
turns out i still have junk left over from the previous clean up.
i didn't find the sketch. but i found something interesting.
found the guestbook i used for my exhibit. back in college we had to construct an actual room and enclose it in glass. each student had his/her design and we set up the modules in greenhills. something like a thesis.
i made a reading room with an ethnic design.
anyways, there were a lot of comments in the guestbook. some had job offers, others merely complimented the design, and still others said i looked cute in my grad pic. o di ba? i was laughing in my grad pic kasi.
one comment struck me though. it said "don't leave this field. you have the talent for it."
how could he or she have known that i had no plans of practicing? i didn't even know it then.
well i did leave the field. at kahit tumaba ang puso ko, i know i don't have the talent for it. i didn't have it then, i don't have it now.
the only reason that room looked so good was because it was how i wanted one of the rooms in my house to look. when i do get to build my house. it was purely motivated by self-interest. i got a very good grade. but that was just a bonus.
so here i am, with a degree in interior design, the only purpose of which is to serve as shock factor.
them: hi. so you graduated from law school. what was your undergraduate course?
me: interior design.
them: WHAAAAAT?
there, purpose served.
maybe someday it will serve some other purpose. but for now, the facial expressions accompanying the WHAAAAAT is still amusing.
turns out i still have junk left over from the previous clean up.
i didn't find the sketch. but i found something interesting.
found the guestbook i used for my exhibit. back in college we had to construct an actual room and enclose it in glass. each student had his/her design and we set up the modules in greenhills. something like a thesis.
i made a reading room with an ethnic design.
anyways, there were a lot of comments in the guestbook. some had job offers, others merely complimented the design, and still others said i looked cute in my grad pic. o di ba? i was laughing in my grad pic kasi.
one comment struck me though. it said "don't leave this field. you have the talent for it."
how could he or she have known that i had no plans of practicing? i didn't even know it then.
well i did leave the field. at kahit tumaba ang puso ko, i know i don't have the talent for it. i didn't have it then, i don't have it now.
the only reason that room looked so good was because it was how i wanted one of the rooms in my house to look. when i do get to build my house. it was purely motivated by self-interest. i got a very good grade. but that was just a bonus.
so here i am, with a degree in interior design, the only purpose of which is to serve as shock factor.
them: hi. so you graduated from law school. what was your undergraduate course?
me: interior design.
them: WHAAAAAT?
there, purpose served.
maybe someday it will serve some other purpose. but for now, the facial expressions accompanying the WHAAAAAT is still amusing.
found him
a week or so ago i posted a blog about this guy i used to have the hots for. hehehe. hankered after is the term i used, i think.
anyways, thanks to friendster, i found him.
clicked on his profile. it says he's interested in serious relationships with men and women. hmmmm... go figure.
still, it was good getting in touch. he's a doctor now.
wonderful, this internet.
anyways, thanks to friendster, i found him.
clicked on his profile. it says he's interested in serious relationships with men and women. hmmmm... go figure.
still, it was good getting in touch. he's a doctor now.
wonderful, this internet.
Wednesday, December 03, 2003
the character first committee
the city mayor's office has a character first committee. every month they come up with posters proclaiming what month it is (october was honesty, november humility) and it has all these sayings on it.
i have been staring at the november poster. it's on the wall above my mom's pc to provide much needed entertainment. i quote:
"it is a joy to honor someone who is not always clamoring for spotlight but instead shares the credit with others. authorities love to exalt a humble person."
excuse me? this, coming from the mayor's office? from a mayor whose huge pictures are plastered all over baguio, who had the letter "v" mounted on all infrastructure, and who even had them mounted on the trash bins???
humility? i think not. take down those streamers and "v"s then we can consider talking about humility.
character first? bullshit. i have seen more character in beggars on the street.
and since i'm lambasting the damned office anyway, and consequently their idiotic posters, let me quote again.
"i will not think more highly on myself than i thought."
somebody explain this to me like i'm a five year old.
i have been staring at the november poster. it's on the wall above my mom's pc to provide much needed entertainment. i quote:
"it is a joy to honor someone who is not always clamoring for spotlight but instead shares the credit with others. authorities love to exalt a humble person."
excuse me? this, coming from the mayor's office? from a mayor whose huge pictures are plastered all over baguio, who had the letter "v" mounted on all infrastructure, and who even had them mounted on the trash bins???
humility? i think not. take down those streamers and "v"s then we can consider talking about humility.
character first? bullshit. i have seen more character in beggars on the street.
and since i'm lambasting the damned office anyway, and consequently their idiotic posters, let me quote again.
"i will not think more highly on myself than i thought."
somebody explain this to me like i'm a five year old.
Tuesday, December 02, 2003
what's bugging me?
wrote a friend of mine in canada. told him was feeling anti-social. i've gotten in touch with exactly 2 friends here in baguio since i arrived. i've taken to long walks and have been staying in my room for hours on end, with a book or my laptop.
his last question was "what's bugging you?"
i don't really know.
i know i should get a job. but that's not what's bothering me.
someday we'll know.
(yek.)
his last question was "what's bugging you?"
i don't really know.
i know i should get a job. but that's not what's bothering me.
someday we'll know.
(yek.)
drink. drink till die.
one of my favorite lines from my sassy girl.
went home at 2 am. went drinking with some friends from manila... well they left at 10. but i had such a good thing going i didn't really want to stop. it was such fun. haven't gone drinkin in quite some time.
was tipsy when i got home. and melancholy.
sigh. maybe maudlin is the word.
went home at 2 am. went drinking with some friends from manila... well they left at 10. but i had such a good thing going i didn't really want to stop. it was such fun. haven't gone drinkin in quite some time.
was tipsy when i got home. and melancholy.
sigh. maybe maudlin is the word.
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